I have to admit that we had a setback. Actually, I should be clear that I had the setback. At 5:00 this morning I held B in my recliner until he woke up at 8. I was just so darn tired!! I've been really trying to focus on not nursing him to sleep, and waiting 5 minutes before getting him. I sincerely hope that my holding him (and letting him nurse) didn't really set us back.
Let me explain why the setback... I fed B at around 1 (I think) and tried to put him down. He immediately started with the kicking/fussing so I thought it was gas. I told myself I would keep putting him down 5 times after bouncing him (to help him burp) then I was going to leave the room and hope that he would fall asleep. Of course, going in to get him if he started actually crying instead of just fussing. We did the bounce/put down thing 5 times, so I put him down one last time and left his room. He fussed (not cried) for 20 minutes and still wasn't sleeping. So I went back in... He immediately burped (and I felt awful for leaving him there with an upset tummy). So I put him back down and he STILL went back to the fussing/kicking thing. After 2 hours of this, I finally got him down and he slept until the 5:00 awakening where I took him to the recliner with me.
Ugh!!!
Monday, January 9, 2012
Saturday, January 7, 2012
Night #2 continued
The rest of the night went pretty well. B woke up at 7 (1 hr after going to bed) I can't remember if I fed him or just bounced him though. (still too much sleep deprivation) but the good news is that he woke up twice and I waited the 5 minutes before getting him and he actually fell back asleep!!!!!! First time eve!!!!!!! That means he slept from 10:30 till 3 and I didn't have to get him (I woke up when he did but didnt have to settle him back to sleep) amazing!! He was up again at 5 and again at 6 for the day but still, 2 night wakings where he fell asleep on his own!! Woo hoo!!!!
Friday, January 6, 2012
Night #2
Well... Night number two of no nursing B to sleep went well (for the "going to sleep" step at least) we'll see how the rest of the night goes. He fussed for maybe a minute or two while I rocked him and then was out!! He was pretty tired though... I was mentally prepared for much worse. Hopefully I haven't jinxed myself now!!
Sleep Training
Neither of my kids were good sleepers as babies. Apparently, neither was I (which is the reason my Mom thinks it's pay back!). With J, I slogged through the sleeplessness until she was 11 months at which point I started a new job running a small nonprofit and just couldn't function anymore. We did the "Cry It Out" (CIO) method, which was my absolute last resort after reading all of Elizabeth Pantley's No Cry Sleep Solution books as well as doing tons of online research. I absolutely hated every second of it, and probably cried just as much as my daughter did. I really REALLY don't want to do that again, and am hoping that by starting earlier with B I can get him to sleep better.
I've found the Baby Sleep Site to be helpful, and after a weekend of wakings every 30 - 60 minutes I finally decided to purchase a customized family sleep plan from them. I should mention that they have a free newsletter that I have found to be helpful, and lots of information on their website, so check it out!
I received my family sleep plan yesterday, and based on the recommendations, following are what we are starting out working on:
I fed B around 6:30, then went up to put him to bed around 6:45. According to the sleep plan, I am to try new tactics for at least 30 minutes before taking a break, so I told myself to expect getting him to sleep without nursing to take at least that long. I ended up bouncing him (on an exercise ball) for a little while but he got pretty upset with not nursing, and he was definitely tired. So I tried my white noise app on my iphone and set it to hairdryer (which both of my kids loved!) which seemed to calm him down a lot. I then rocked him for maybe 5 minutes and he fell asleep! I am supposed to be careful to not create new sleep associations that would be required every time he wakes up, but I thought that if I have to leave the white noise on all night it would be an improvement and then we can work on weaning him off of it. I turned off the white noise slowly, and put him to bed (holding down his arm that was unswaddled since he still has that "startle reflex." He moved around a tiny bit, but fell asleep!!
He slept until 9:30 (2 1/2 hours, which isn't great, but isn't horrible either - for him - ) I told myself I would wait the 5 minutes, but he started fully crying right away so I went in after about 90 seconds. I just find it SO HARD to not comfort him when he cries. Maybe it's because I worked so hard in the beginning to get him to stop crying because he had colic, that now if he cries and I know what I can do to make him stop, I want to do that thing!
I picked B up and nursed him to sleep as usual (treating night time awakenings as I usually do) and bounced him for 2 minutes to help him burp, put him down and he did ok! He woke up again at around 11 (I think... it's all a blur) and I was able to wait the 5 minutes! I did the same thing with nursing/bouncing and put him down.
B woke up about 30 minutes later (around 11:45) and I did the same, then he was up again at 1 and then again at 5 (a 4 hour stretch!!!). I was thrilled!!! Usually his longest sleep is his first, with each subsequent waking coming closer and closer together, so the fact that he had such a long stretch that late in the night (morning) was fantastic! I put him down after nursing again and he woke up for the day at 6:30. All in all, not a bad night considering how he usually does!
I'm hoping that by tracking how the sleep training is going I will eventually be able to see progress. I know that by not using the CIO method it will take longer, but at this point, I'm ok with that.
I've found the Baby Sleep Site to be helpful, and after a weekend of wakings every 30 - 60 minutes I finally decided to purchase a customized family sleep plan from them. I should mention that they have a free newsletter that I have found to be helpful, and lots of information on their website, so check it out!
I received my family sleep plan yesterday, and based on the recommendations, following are what we are starting out working on:
- work on B's first "going to bed" time (and treat his night wakings the same way I have been). I am to work on naps once night time sleep has improved
- nurse B before I actually put him to bed to try to break his nurse-to-sleep association
- swaddle him with one arm out to begin to train him to sleep unswaddled. This is supposed to allow him to use his hands/fingers to self soothe <hopefully!>
- try to wait 5 - 10 minutes before picking him up and putting him back to sleep for his night wakings.
I fed B around 6:30, then went up to put him to bed around 6:45. According to the sleep plan, I am to try new tactics for at least 30 minutes before taking a break, so I told myself to expect getting him to sleep without nursing to take at least that long. I ended up bouncing him (on an exercise ball) for a little while but he got pretty upset with not nursing, and he was definitely tired. So I tried my white noise app on my iphone and set it to hairdryer (which both of my kids loved!) which seemed to calm him down a lot. I then rocked him for maybe 5 minutes and he fell asleep! I am supposed to be careful to not create new sleep associations that would be required every time he wakes up, but I thought that if I have to leave the white noise on all night it would be an improvement and then we can work on weaning him off of it. I turned off the white noise slowly, and put him to bed (holding down his arm that was unswaddled since he still has that "startle reflex." He moved around a tiny bit, but fell asleep!!
He slept until 9:30 (2 1/2 hours, which isn't great, but isn't horrible either - for him - ) I told myself I would wait the 5 minutes, but he started fully crying right away so I went in after about 90 seconds. I just find it SO HARD to not comfort him when he cries. Maybe it's because I worked so hard in the beginning to get him to stop crying because he had colic, that now if he cries and I know what I can do to make him stop, I want to do that thing!
I picked B up and nursed him to sleep as usual (treating night time awakenings as I usually do) and bounced him for 2 minutes to help him burp, put him down and he did ok! He woke up again at around 11 (I think... it's all a blur) and I was able to wait the 5 minutes! I did the same thing with nursing/bouncing and put him down.
B woke up about 30 minutes later (around 11:45) and I did the same, then he was up again at 1 and then again at 5 (a 4 hour stretch!!!). I was thrilled!!! Usually his longest sleep is his first, with each subsequent waking coming closer and closer together, so the fact that he had such a long stretch that late in the night (morning) was fantastic! I put him down after nursing again and he woke up for the day at 6:30. All in all, not a bad night considering how he usually does!
I'm hoping that by tracking how the sleep training is going I will eventually be able to see progress. I know that by not using the CIO method it will take longer, but at this point, I'm ok with that.
Introduction
I'm not sure exactly why I feel compelled to blog about the trials of juggling motherhood, a personal life and work, but maybe it's because I'm hoping others of you out there can relate and may even benefit from my ravings. I should preface all of my posts by saying that I will try to be fairly anonymous. I'm sure there will be time that I will go off on a rant, and wouldn't want to hurt any of my loved ones or professional acquaintances, so I will use initials when talking about people in my posts.
I am the mother of two wonderful children, J is a girl and was born in 2009 and B is a boy and was born in 2011. Currently J is almost 3 and B is 4 months old. My major issue on the home-front is with B not sleeping... like getting up at least 8+ times every night. A good night is him getting up 5 times! Not only that, I'm one of those unfortunate people who needs a LOT of sleep, so this sleep deprivation thing is pretty tough on me.
I also have suffered from depression for my entire adult (and teenage) life. Lack of sleep tends to tip the scales toward depression for me, and with my already existing history I'm already at increased risk for post partum depression. (Interestingly, I just learned that PPD tends to show up around 3 months post partum and after... which is right where I am) I feel like I'm flirting with PPD on a daily basis. My psychologist believes the antidepressants I am already on may be helping to keep me from tipping over into full blown PPD, but I definitely feel like I'm on the precipice.
I have a wonderful husband, whom I'll call DH (dear husband) in this blog. He is a wonderful man who is immensely helpful with the kids and understanding about my depression. The poor man has had to deal with my resurging depression during both pregnancies (I went off my antidepressants during my whole pregnancy with J and during the first trimester with B), and now again with the lack of sleep taking its toll.
I think that's it for now. My next several posts will likely be talking about my journey through sleep training with my 4 month old son, since that's the biggest item to be juggled on my horizon right now...
I am the mother of two wonderful children, J is a girl and was born in 2009 and B is a boy and was born in 2011. Currently J is almost 3 and B is 4 months old. My major issue on the home-front is with B not sleeping... like getting up at least 8+ times every night. A good night is him getting up 5 times! Not only that, I'm one of those unfortunate people who needs a LOT of sleep, so this sleep deprivation thing is pretty tough on me.
I also have suffered from depression for my entire adult (and teenage) life. Lack of sleep tends to tip the scales toward depression for me, and with my already existing history I'm already at increased risk for post partum depression. (Interestingly, I just learned that PPD tends to show up around 3 months post partum and after... which is right where I am) I feel like I'm flirting with PPD on a daily basis. My psychologist believes the antidepressants I am already on may be helping to keep me from tipping over into full blown PPD, but I definitely feel like I'm on the precipice.
I have a wonderful husband, whom I'll call DH (dear husband) in this blog. He is a wonderful man who is immensely helpful with the kids and understanding about my depression. The poor man has had to deal with my resurging depression during both pregnancies (I went off my antidepressants during my whole pregnancy with J and during the first trimester with B), and now again with the lack of sleep taking its toll.
I think that's it for now. My next several posts will likely be talking about my journey through sleep training with my 4 month old son, since that's the biggest item to be juggled on my horizon right now...
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